Emotional Maturity

A big indicator of whether you have the emotional maturity to weather the storms of a shared life is how good you are at delaying gratification. If either you or your partner are still letting "I want to feel good right now" rule your life without taking a long view of consequences you are not ready. If you are immediate gratification-driven but in love with the idea of commitment you may think you have found "the one" many times over, only to break up and start over again. Or you may try to have your cake and eat it too by keeping more than one partner in play and giving mixed messages about commitment to all of them.

Another indicator of emotional maturity is embracing interdependence - the ability to be self-reliant while also being comfortable with giving and accepting support. If you are afraid you can't live contentedly and well without a partner, chances are you will make relationship decisions that are based on security-seeking rather than balanced self-sufficiency and ability to depend on others. The more dependent you are, the more likely you are to think every love affair is "the one" at first, in order to hold on to (a false) sense of security.

On the other hand, if you're looking for love but you've convinced yourself that it's foolish or weak to ever depend on anyone other than yourself, you are what psychologists call "counter-dependent" - and you'll make sure it's never a good time to commit. You might do this by rationalizing that no one ever meets your copious criteria for a perfect match, when the real deal is you don't trust anyone to share the reins with you. For some people, interdependence is easier to maintain in friendships than romantic bonds because romantic attachments dredge up many more family-of-origin vulnerabilities related to abandonment, control, sexual anxieties etc.
Emotional maturity also includes the ability to be resilient after suffering losses.

If you are afraid that losing love will crush you beyond repair you are more likely to try to force-fit inappropriate partners into your love mold and stay in bad relationships too long just because breaking up seems unbearably painful. If you are confident that you can pick yourself up and learn something about yourself and others from relationships that don't work out, you can cut your losses in a healthy way. Finally, emotionally mature people have a developed sense of empathy. They can understand and support someone else's feelings and attitudes, even if they disagree, without jeopardizing their own