Beware of the Loner

If you’re the type of person who loves to hang out with a bunch of people at once and can’t stand being by yourself, dating a loner is going to be difficult. You may want to double date while she’d just want to be with you alone. You may want to have a party while she’d just rather have a quiet night at home. You may regard her as lonely, but loners are a different type of people. Ask a loner if that person is lonely, and chances are she’ll say, “No!!!” A loner is content in her own company. She actually enjoys the idea of going to movie theaters and not having the movie spoiled because you’re whispering to her about what’s going to happen next. She likes hanging out in restaurants at a table for one while reading a good book. She wants to shop on her own so she doesn’t have to hang out in line waiting on you. She enjoys doing her own thing.

The problem with loners is that they have a habit of making those who are dating them (or even friends with them) feel like they don’t want them around. But if a loner embraces you in a relationship or friendship, she doesn’t want to mistreat you. For her, hanging out is just that enjoyable all by herself or with you. More often than not, loners adore the few people that they voluntarily surround themselves with.

5 Tips on Dating a Loner

1) If a loner says she doesn’t want to be bothered, you have every right to ask her if you did something wrong or is she mad at you. If she says no, believe it. There are times when a loner just finds being around people, especially people who want her attention, unbearable.

2) Make your needs known early in the relationship. If you are the social butterfly who wants to have social gatherings every month or want to hang out with your friends, your loner partner should never try to stop you from doing that.

3) Try to be cordial to the few friends and family that your loner partner likes to be around. A loner keeps a tightly knit group around her, which means she usually respects these people on a different level. It’s a very bad idea to ignore those who your loner partner has a bond with.

4) Never try to surprise a loner with a party unless you absolutely know she wants one. More than likely, there will be people at that party she won’t like or people she really would rather not be around.

5) Do not try to force your loner partner into being like you. It’s a terrible idea and will never work. The same way you’ll never understand why she’d rather go on a vacation by herself instead of with 10 friends is the way she feels about you inviting 13 people over to watch a game of football. For her, hanging out is just that enjoyable all by herself or with you.