...Hate the Game

Don't hate the Player....

If there is one true enemy of monogamy other than the fact as humans we resist it, is the fact that we love to play games with one another. Hell, there have been many movies based upon how to manipulate the opposite sex. There is a common misconception that Men are the primary culprits in playing the dating game, however women are just as competitive as men as have a tendency to yearn for the upper hand in any relationship. What makes us want to play with the emotions of another? Are we too insecure?! Too confident?!? Or do we just love a dramatic endeavour?


"I'm not going to text him, he has to text me if he wants me."



"I'm not gonna be the stage 5 clinger..."



"Why didn't he call?"



"How come she hasn't text me back yet?"



I could go on and on and on...etc with numerous examples of games we play with each other to maintain control of a relationship. It's strange to think a human being would take pleasure in making another person feel insecure or on edge just to maintain "control" in what's supposed to be a romantic relationship. Yes, vulnerability is something we all try to avoid, as no one longs to have their feelings hurt or even their heart broken. However, without said vulnerability it will be impossible to obtain any type of meaningful relationship.


Since the beginning of modern civilization men have been taught to be strong, independent, the alpha male, the protector and immune to any type of emotion. The problem is, that man also have a natural want to find a life partner in a woman with whom he can share his life with. Obviously the want to be the dominant force in a relationship and the need to spend life as a compassionate partner and lover create quite a conundrum within the male mind. (see also overcompensation)


The roles of women in both relationships and the world have rapidly evolved over the course of time. Woman are now encouraged to speak their mind and no longer take a backseat to men in business or in the realm of love. The problem is that this evolution has created both a wonderful thing in female equality in the workplace and in romance and a terrible thing in giving the woman free reign as manipulators of the male mind and body.


So never mind the fact that both women and men naturally want to be compassionate, loving and caring towards each other, because relationships have clearly become a power struggle rather than a romantic union of two people.


Enter..."the game."


By definition, "the game," is the struggle between two people to equally give mentally, emotionally and physically in a romantic relationship due to the fear of rejection. So now that both man and woman feel it necessary to have an advantage or the upper hand in a romantic relationship, the game has evolved from a childish exchange of stubbornness, into a battle for supremacy in what used to be an EQUAL partnership.


Members of the opposite sex playing emotional games of "hard to get" is nothing new. It's been going on since anyone can document. Women want to be chased, men chase after them, then once they get them they don't want them anymore, then the women chase after the men....and so on and so forth. Perhaps the problem with the game, relationships and the world in general is the wanting of what we can't have or the chase, or what most of us know as GREED!!



My advice to anyone involved in a relationship in which games reign supreme...GET OUT!!! The odds are not in your favor, mostly because you, yourself, are part of the equation. Until as a society we find it acceptable to show vulnerability and determine it's ok to be selfless, the success rate of relationships will continue to decline.