The Project

(For the women of the world)

As a man, it's hard for me to just sit back and watch women make the same mistake over and over............and over when it comes to their approach to relationships. Maybe it's your inherent need to fix a problem. Your natural tendency to be optimistic?! How about your emotions taking control of your god-given superior intelligence?!?! My guess is, that it's: D) All of the above. Society wants both men and women to believe in that Hollywood ending type of relationship in which a woman meets a man, typically guarded and chauvinistic, changes the way he views women and relationships, and then accordingly falls in love and lives happily ever after...

Do you believe in that?!.......................God, I hope not!!

Sadly as it is, (straight) men are incapable of growth, change or progress unless they do so on their own terms. Actually, the more you attempt to create change within a man, the more likely he is to rebel against such reform. The male ego is a combination of pride and insecurity, which usually creates a recipe for a high degree of stubbornness. The problem with this is that a large number of women choose to ignore "red flags" in a relationship in fear of ending up alone. The want to be loved is natural, but subjecting yourself to an unhealthy relationship isn't worth the time or energy.

I'm not going to speak for all men, but many of us view relationships very differently than women. For many men relationships are about sex, control and convenience. They see something they want, manipulate their way into getting it and once they have it, they exploit it. Men often play on the insecurities of women and use it to their full advantage. One of my favorite quotes in relationships and in life is, "if you give a mouse a cookie, he's going to want a glass of milk." Sure there are the sensitive, fun loving and understanding men of the world who love to listen and make great cuddle buddies, but let's face it, most women don't go for the "good guys," or "safe bets."

What I'm saying should come as no surprise to women as they've been subjected to "wrong" men for a majority of their lives. However, the days of using past boyfriends or a bad childhood as an excuse for being in dysfunctional relationships is over. I get it, you're dad didn't pay enough attention to you and you dated a guy that made you feel irrelevant. There are people all over the world who've had worse upbringings and even worse relationships....stop feeling sorry for yourself!!! The problem is that as much as you complain about being with a man who doesn't appreciate you or treat you fairly, you seem to thrive on the drama that accompanies such a relationship.

So what is it that makes these men so intriguing?! Is it the human desire to want what we can't have? I feel it is imperative that I disclose something that remains a mystery to many women all over the world. Men know that you are smarter. We also know that if you overcame your tendency to be emotional and insecure, you could rule the world. That's not an exaggeration, you could literally rule the world. You have two major advantages over men that we can never compete with. #1. You all have the ability to give and take away sexual privileges as you wish. This is the most common form of torture known to man, so use it to your advantage. #2. You are all emotional terrorists. Your natural ability to rip apart a mans ego with a subtle yet indirect comment is the second most common form of torture known to man...and I discourage you from using this too frequently as you could rid the world of all male dominance.

The bottom line is that if women want to be in a good relationship, they need to be with a GOOD man. Not just a good looking man. Not just a charming man. Not a "man in training." Someone who treats you with the same respect you treat them. I'm giving you these credentials because so many of you look past things that matter for things on the surface. I'm not telling you to date quazzy moto or the cript keeper with a heart of gold. I'm telling you that if you continue to make poor decisions....just don't bitch about it. Because you've done it to yourself.